I Look Like Who?

I Guess I Remember How To Do This...

So I guess it's been a month since I've posted. Where did it go?

It goes something like this...working...sick...working...sick...

mini vacation...quit my job.

I got the same cold/flu crap everyone else has and then it settled in my lungs, so I got an upper respiratory infection. I'm on my second round of antibiotics and still not feeling all that hot. My mini vacation was a trip to Grand Lake, Colorado with Nick, Ali & Charlie. It was SO much fun..you can see the pictures of Nick and I making out at FlipFlops if you so desire. It is a little later in the season than we are used to but a 'Shasta McNasty*' tastes the same no matter what time of year. I quit my job because I have a new one...starts October 16th...more about it later.

*Shasta McNasty = 180 energy drink with a shot of orange vodka dropped into it

It's a funny story, but I think I'll explain it in another post.

Sur-real

Hey Everyone...Remember me? Sorry I've been slacking and unfortunately I'm frickin busy today so I only have one thing to say.

Tom & Katie's baby is beautiful. Not that I had any doubt that she would be, but damn.

Guest Posts Welcome

So apparently my lack of attention to this blog has upset some of my loyal daily readers. (aka my mom) So here is my formal apology and invitation to those of you that think you can keep up with a daily blog, (on top of 52 hour work weeks, friends and a boyfriend) just let me know and I will be happy to let you guest post.

Elvis Gooey Butter Cake

I got brave a couple of weeks ago and found this recipe online. (thanks Paula Dean) It sounded awesome, so after consulting my co-workers I decided to bake it.

Here is the recipe...

Cake:
1 (18 1/4-ounce) package yellow cake mix
1 egg
8 tablespoons (1 stick) butter, melted

Filling: 1 (8-ounce) package cream cheese, softened
3 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla
1/2 cup peanut butter
1 whole banana
8 tablespoons (1 stick) butter
1 (16-ounce) box powdered sugar

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees.

Combine the cake mix, egg, and butter together and mix well. Pat into a lightly greased glass 13 by 9-inch baking pan. Prepare the filling.
Beat the cream cheese until smooth. Add the eggs and vanilla. Add the peanut butter; beat. Add the banana and butter and mix well. Add the powdered sugar and mix well. Spread over the cake mixture. Bake for 45 to 50 minutes. You want the center to be a little gooey, so do not over bake.

OK, lets just say....EWWW! It was nasty. I brought it into work and only two people liked it. That's right folks, two out of 65 people would actually eat it. What the hell? That's the last time I get brave with something other than chocolate. You can never mess up chocolate.

Sorry...

been super busy...I'll be back next week.

One Ocean View

In the tradition of crazy reality shows like Filthy Rich Cattle Drive, I started watching One Ocean View on abc. Remember how Fabian was such a pain in the ass on the FRCD?

Well Usman is going to be the pain in the ass on this show. He's arrogant, egotistical and way too concerned about his hair. It's gotta make for good tv right? (Mondays 9pm mtn)

So That's What Those Are For...

Thanks for the tip Julio

I Hate George Bush...'Nuff Said

During Bill Clinton's tenure gas prices rose on average about 2% a year. Since Bush has taken over prices have risen on average over 17% a year. That's almost 9 times the rate of Bill Clinton. Think about it...Nine times!

Pillow Pants

I'm a huge slacker, it just occurred to me that it's Thursday and I haven't posted in a week. Speaking of a week ago, we went to see Clerks 2 last Friday night. It was way funnier than I thought it would be and I was pleasantly surprised. I just have one thing to say...'Pillow Pants.'

I'm IT...Friday Five

Damn You Jimmy and your tagging antics. I haven't posted on a friday in a while. Here it goes...
5 Things always in my laptop bag
Hmm...Considering I've carried my laptop bag a total of 4 times, this should be interesting.
1. Travel charger
2. A pen
3. Sticky notes
4. Sky Mall magazine, because I NEVER get tired of looking at it
5. The tag I cut off of it, yes I'm too lazy to throw it away

5 Things always in my purse
I just read the original on flea's blog and I like this question better, but I already did the laptop question...so tough, now there's six
1. My wallet
2. Lip gloss
3. Gum/Mints
4. Pen
5. Face Powder

5 Things always in my wallet
1. Debit Card
2. Drivers License
3. My business cards
4. A picture of the next tattoo I'm getting
5. Gift cards...I always seem to have at least one

5 Things always in my refrigerator
I'm with Jimmy on this one...My fridge is SO sad
1. Ketchup
2. A can of 7-up, because I hate it and will never drink it
3. Margarine, and lots of it...I use it for baking
4. Yeah...
5. That's it

5 Things always in my closet
1. A pair of 'Hammer' pants circa 1987
2. Way too many pairs of flip flops
3. Way too many pairs of pajamas
4. Way too many sweaters
5. Bridesmaids dresses

5 Things always in my car
If you know me at all, you realize how funny this question is...
1. Unlabeled CD's...I never know what's gonna be next
2. Pennies, and lots of them
3. At least one jacket/coat/scarf/hat, usually more that one of each
4. Ice scraper
5. Phone charger

5 (or more) Things always on my desk
1. Hand sanitizer...Duh, I work in a hospital
2. Highlighters
3. Stapler
4. Scissors
5. Sticky notes

Yea! Construction Workers

The hospital I work at has been remodeling for...Oh, I don't know fucking forever...Or about a year and a half now. They finally finished the new ICU and have been making a big to-do about its opening. (just like they did with the ER, though the TV's in the private rooms are nice. Yeah yeah I know all about it, I'm clumsy) So today was the big launch and before they start moving patients into the new space they wanted to show it off with an 'open house.' When I say open house I mean tours, food and refreshments. So they make an announcement overhead and the mad dash begins. A couple of people in my department finally made it up there a little after noon. (I of course don't get to go because I'm working alone and can't possible leave my area longer than 2 minutes to pee) Here's the funny part...No food. The people catering the event have begun to tell everyone that the reason there isn't any food left is because they got a huge rush of construction workers and THEY ate all the food. Well, duh, they built the damn place. Wouldn't you plan for that? They are all still here working on other projects. So needless to say everyone in the hospital is pissed they didn't get any free food. I'm with the construction workers, I would have run my overworked/underpaid ass up there and ate all the free food too.

Duh

Hell yeah it's hot...It's July. Duh!

Good News Mom...

Kramer has some competition.

This cat weighs 33 lbs and eats 6 lbs of chicken and pork a day. Can't even imagine what that costs?

Makes Cents?

I was watching one of the national news shows last night, and they did a story on the penny and how it costs 1.4 cents to make each one? Wait just a minute...That's 13 billion pennies per year at 1.4 cents each? I'm no math wiz but I think this is a problem. Due to rising metal costs it actually costs more than a penny to make a penny? I think I could do without them. Would you get rid of them or save them?

Here's the best part, who is a spokesman for the Save the Penny campaign? Oh yeah, Kevin Federline (aka Mr Britney Spears.) I'm sorry but I'm having a hard time making the correlation between pennies and Kevin Federline. Is there anything the man won't do?

Kissables

The selection in the candy machine at work is pathetic. I wanted chocolate and my options were kissables, extra crispy kit kat or payday. Can someone explain the difference between kissables and mm's? Is Hershey's chocolate that much better? I think they taste just about the same.

Seriously? It Made How Much?

Yes, I was part of that $132M opening weekend for
'Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest.'
I wasn't impressed, it was entertaining but slow and too long. Anyone else see it?

Sucked The Sadness Right Out of Me

Nick and I saw 'The Lake House' last weekend and holy crap was it boring. It makes me mad when a movie has the potential to make me a blubbering fool and then falls short, really really short.

Measles Shmeasles

Hi I'm back, don't know where I went but I'm back. So my mumps test results came back last week and there was good news and bad news. Well, actually it sucks either way, I do have immunity to the mumps but not the measles. Remember when you were a kid and had the series of shots before you went to school? It's called the MMR or Measles, Mumps and Rubella. I went to Employee Health today because they have decided to provide the vaccine to everyone who needs it. They are always willing to stick you with a needle. But here's the deal, you can't just get a shot for the measles you have to get the whole MMR again. wtf? The nurse says to me 'this will sting a little,' and jabs the tiny needle into the back of my tricep muscle. A little? Holy Shit it hurt. It was like a really really long burning bee sting. No wonder kids cry when they get that shot, I almost did. I did treat myself to Chipotle for lunch for all my pain and suffering. The really great news is I get another one in the other arm in 28 days. Fun! I can't wait.

It's Only Monday?

Crap people my weekends are killing me. I'm so damn tired. On a side note...I'm ecstatic that the second season of 'It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia' starts on Thursday. I missed it so.

Damn You Otto Titzling

Dear Otto,

Screw you for inventing the bra.

Sincerely,

Jess

Sometimes Working in a Hospital is Just Plain Scary

Today I had to get tested for Mumps because the hospital 6 blocks away had an outbreak. Like everyone else I got all the vaccinations as a kid, but apparently there is still a 10-20% chance that you can get it anyway. Scary right? (& 3 years ago I tested positive for exposure to TB, awesome) Then to top off the day the nurses in my department thought they would do the blacklight handwashing test. Basically you get a special lotion to rub on your hands, they send you to wash them and then you get to see where you have missed. All the spots you miss are where the germs would be. Have you ever done this? It's nasty. I did well in the spots that most people miss. Yea! me.
(and no that's not my hand in the picture, mine was nowhere near that gross) Who says singing the alphabet song twice while washing your hands doesn't pay off? It so does.

Happy Father's Day Daddy

So Did She Say Yes?

ANN ARBOR, Mich. (associated press) - A marriage-minded man ran naked through his neighborhood, trying to show his hesitant girlfriend that taking risks is important. He got more than he bargained for when he ended up being chased and shot at. read more...

I'm not sure but I think that plan back fired?

An Undersea Lodge? Who Would Have Thought

I accidentally found this on the net and I don't know about you but this scares me a little. The Jules Undersea Lodge. (even if I was a diver I don't think I could stay there) Plus it's like $295 per person/per night, or for the romantic diver, the honeymoon package is $1195. Uh, I don't think so.

General Confusion

So a while back I was talking about summer TV and the fact that I wanted to start watching General Hospital again. So when I got home this afternoon I sat down to watch it. Wait, first let me start by saying that I have watched GH off and on for years. My mom watched it when I was a really young girl, and then I started watching it religiously in high school and even planned my college classes around it. After that the show started getting stupid so I stopped watching it regularly and I would just catch an episode here and there, like when I was home sick. But I was always able to catch up, things don't move quickly on a soap opera. That said, when I sat down to watch today, I was so frickin confused. Courtney has died? the baby belongs to Nikolas? and Sonny has gone crazy? When did it get so confusing? It used to be simple and I loved it. Let's see if I can get through another couple of episodes?

Stupid Cell Phone...Way to Ruin My Day

Stupid frickin' cell phone decided to not to work anymore. The little chargie thingy has broken off and is now rattling inside the phone. Can't imagine why it doesn't want to charge anymore. Have to go buy a new one...Shit. I'll be back....

So here's the new phone I bought...Now I have to learn how to use it.

Oh, and let me tell you the best part, I can't get any of my phone numbers. So if you know me...You might want to text me and give me your number again :(

Purely For Ali's Entertainment

Here ya go buddy...Just trying to help.

Quiz Stop

and here are a couple of my favorites...

Are You A Nerd?

The Pirate Adventure Quiz

If You Had 2 Heads, Would One of 'em Turn on You?

Thank You Colonel

Today at work we (Alisha, Dana, Marsha and I) tried the New KFC Bowl. Who wouldn't love it? Mashed potatoes, gravy, corn, chicken and cheese all in one bowl? The general consensus...It's Awesome!

Dallas Recap

Ok, so I found out Wednesday that my mom could get me a cheap ticket to Dallas if I could fly out Friday morning. Hey, long weekend in Texas and my cousin Tiffany was getting married...Fun right? Well, I had a 7 am flight out of Denver, which means I had to get up at 4:30 am to drive my tired ass to the airport. Not fun. My mom and cousin Todd picked me up from DFW and we drove to the small town where my family lives. I took a nap and then we were off to the rehearsal/rehearsal dinner. Yummy food. Saturday I woke up early thanks to the previous days nap and I started washing fruit. Then Todd and I went to the reception site so we could set up tables and linens. We spent the entire day in the blazing 95 degree super humid sun doing everything we can get our hands on to ensure Tiff and Michael's wedding was fabulous. The wedding was indeed beautiful and thank goodness for the frozen Bellini's at the reception. Tiffany and Michael looked fantastic and I think they had a good time. (I know they are having a good time in Mexico right now) After I finally got up at noon on Sunday, I spent the rest of the day by the pool (sweating my ass off) and then we drove back to Dallas. I also somehow ended up with a huge nasty bruise on the inside of my calf. How the hell did that happen? What's with me and bruises lately? Anyway, the flight back on Monday was a little bumpy and not fun for the scared flyer that I am, but that pretty much sums up my weekend.

Sorry Y'all

I just don't have time to post this week. I'll be in Dallas until Monday. Have a good weekend.

Memorial Day Weekend Recap....

BEER!

My Name is Jess and I Have a TV Addiction

1. LOST didn't suck. I think I'll be excited to watch it when it comes on again in the fall.
2. The summer TV schedule better be good, I don't want to suffer withdrawal.
3. I've already started researching the Fall TV schedule. (ABC is offering sneak peaks)
4. I haven't watched Oprah in 4 days. (and it wont happen today either)
5. My DVR is at 42%, even though most shows are over for the season.
6. I'm thinking I might start watching General Hospital again. I haven't seen it in months.

LOST Let Down

Does anyone else think this season of LOST is a let down? Last season I was home watching every week. I was devastated if I missed and episode, even though I was recording it. I could totally care less this season. I can't tell you how many times I was watching the previous weeks episode right before the new one. I'm hoping the 2 hour season finale brings me back. I need something really good to happen.

Does This Still Make Me a Daddy's Girl?

So I talked to my dad today and he was complaining about how we never see each other. The sad news is we live exactly 5.2 miles apart. Anyway, we decided to go have a few beers tonight...On me. How cool is that? How many people have a dad that will go drink beers on a Tuesday night and let their daughter pay for it? I'm guessing not many.

I Got The Best Present Yesterday...

Do you all remember when I posted this? Well, someone listened and bought it for me. I love it & I can't stop watching. (I can't believe I was 8 when this was on)

Nuts 101

Ok, I'm picky about Nuts too, I wont eat them if they are sweet. One exception is chocolate covered hazelnuts.

• Almonds - No
• Brazil - No
• Cashews - No
• Chestnuts - No
• Hazelnuts - Yes
• Macadamias - No
• Peanuts - Yes, including peanut butter, but preferably creamy not crunchy
• Pecans - Yes
• Pine - No
• Pinon - No
• Pistachios - No
• Sunflower - Yes
• Walnuts - Yes, but pretty much only in cookies or ice cream

Fruit 101

• Apples - Yes, green only
• Apricots - Yes
• Bananas - Yes
• Blackberries - Jam only
• Blueberries - Jam only
• Cantaloupe - Yes
• Cherries - Yes
• Coconut - Yes
• Cranberries - Juice only
• Grapefruit - Yes
• Grapes - Green only
• Guava - No
• Honeydew - Yes
• Kiwi - No
• Lemons- Yes
• Limes- Yes
• Mango - No
• Nectarine - No
• Oranges - Yes
• Peaches - Yes
• Pears - Yes
• Plums - Yes
• Pomegranate- No
• Raspberries - Jam only
• Rhubarb - No
• Strawberries - Yes
• Tangerine - No
• Watermelon - Yes

Meat/Seafood 101

Let me start by saying I will eat meat as long as it isn't prepared with anything sweet, NO SWEET MEAT. I also love my meat overcooked. Jerky is awesome.

• Brats - No
• Chicken - Yes, All day everyday
• Ham - Very Rarely, but yes to bacon
• Hamburger - Yes
• Hot Dogs - No
• Lamb - No
• Pepperoni - Yes
• Pork Chops - Yes
• Ribs - No
• Sausage - Yes, but not Polish
• Spam - no need to even ask
• Steak - Yes, if chopped and in something, never an actual steak
• Turkey - All day everyday
• Veal - No

I don't eat seafood. I will eat tuna occasionally, but only if it's packed in water, has a ridiculous amount of black pepper on it and served on saltine crackers. And that's it...Period.

Vegetables 101

Recently more than one person has given me a hard time about how picky I am about food. I thought I would make a little list and you can tell me if it's that weird.
We will start with Vegetables.

• Artichoke - No
• Asparagus - No
• Avocado - No
• Beans - Yes (including black, pinto, lima)
• Beets - No
• Bell Peppers - No to all colors
• Broccoli - Yes, but cooked
• Brussels sprouts - Yes
• Cauliflower - No
• Cabbage - No
• Carrot - No
• Celery - No
• Corn - Yes, but not creamed
• Cucumber - No
• Eggplant - No
• Green Beans - Yes
• Lettuce - Yes
• Mushroom - No, occasionally if cooked in something like pasta sauce, not on pizza
• Onion - Yes if cooked and in something, never raw
• Peas - Yes (including chickpeas & black-eyed)
• Potato - YES all day everyday, but not sweet potatoes
• Pumpkin - only in pie or ice cream, no squash or zucchini
• Radish - No
• Spinach - Yes, preferably cooked
• Tomato - Yes, if cooked and in something, never raw

Ok I've never actually made a list, so it's funny, but it's not that weird, is it?

Hey Jealousy

I'm going to the Avs game tonight...they better win.

Drink....Period

(Ok, so it just occurred to me that I wrote this post yesterday and saved it as a draft and then never posted it. Sorry ya'll)

So my mom called me at work today and we started talking about her upcoming trip to Vegas with her best friend. (bitches) Anyway, when I asked her what they were going to do this is kinda how the conversation went...

Me: "What are you planning to do?"
Mom: "There isn't a set plan, the only thing I really want to do is go to Toby Keith's Bar"
Me: "Where is it?"
Mom: "I don't remember, It's in the Vegas book at home, I can look it up"
Me: "Oh"
Mom: "Let me put it to you this way, I want to see what I want to see, eat when i'm hungry, sleep when i'm tired and....drink."
Me: "Well, you know you can carry your drink with you on the street"
Mom: "Oh, I KNOW"

That about sums it up, good point mom. Drink your little heart out.

Oh, Like You've Never Thought It?

I think this is hilarious...

Beer vs Pussy

1. Beer is always wet. Pussy needs a little work. *One point to Beer
2. Warm beer tastes awful. *One point to Pussy
3. A really cold beer is satisfying. *One point to Beer
4. If after taking a swig of your favorite beer you find a hair between your teeth, you may vomit. *One point to Pussy
5. If you get home reeking of beer your wife may get mad, make a scene, kick you out, etc. If you get home reeking of Pussy your wife may get mad, kick you out, even leave you. There's definitely a point to be had here, depending on your point of view and personal circumstances. I'll just call it a DRAW for the time being.
6. Ten beers in one night and you can't drive home. Ten Pussy's in one night and you don't want to drive anywhere. *One point to Pussy
7. If you have a lot of beer in a public place, your reputation may suffer. If you eat any Pussy in public, you become a legend. *One point to Pussy
8. If a cop stops you and you smell of beer you may get arrested. If you smell of Pussy he may buy you a beer. *One point to Pussy
9. You normally don't find old beer. *One point to Beer
10. Too much beer and you'll think you see flying saucers. Too much Pussy and you'll think you've seen God. *One point to Pussy
11. Ripping off a beer bottle label is boring. Ripping off panties is fun. *One point to Pussy
12. In most countries there's a tax on beer. *One point to Pussy
13. If you have another beer the first one never gets pissed off. *One point to Beer
14. You can always be sure if you're the first one to open a bottle or a can. *One point to Beer
15. If you shake beer it'll get all agitated but eventually it settles down. *One point to Beer
16. With beer you always have choice: clear, dark, pilsner, ale, lager, etc. *One point to Beer
17. You always know how much beer is going to cost. *One point to Beer
18. Beer doesn't have a mother. *One point to Beer
19. Beer never expects to be hugged for half an hour after you drink it. *One point to Beer
20. (If you want to comment and tell me what #2o should be, I'll post the best answer!)

FINAL SCORE: Beer: 10 Pussy: 8

That's it! The matter is settled, the clear winner is: BEER
I don't know too many men that would agree, but that's another post.

The Norelco 'Bodygroom' Can Make Your *BEEP* Look Bigger?

Although I am aware of the 'optical inch,' I generally make it a rule not to discuss male body grooming. With that said, this has got to be the best online product launch/commercial ever. Make sure you check out the main menu and look at all the options, it just gets better and better. Thanks to everlastingknowitall for the lead.

Holy Stress

I am a little stressed right now...My brain is turning to mush. Need sleep. No, need beer. No, need sleep. Beer. Ugh, I don't even know. Is it possible to inject liquor directly into my veins while I'm sleeping? Has someone figured out how to do this. I don't need much, just a little drip throughout the night. It would help me wake up in a much better state of mind or I just wouldn't care anymore. That sounds good.

The Name Game

Ok I'm obviously totally bored today...I snagged this from Flea's blog.

1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet and current street name) - KC Dartmouth
2. YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME: (grandfather/grandmother on your mother's side, your favorite candy) - Thelma York
3. YOUR "FLY GIRL/GUY" NAME: (first initial of first name, first two or three letters of your last name) - J Ash
4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite animal, favorite color) - Moose Blue
5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born) - Ann Denver
6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (first 3 letters of your last name, last 3 letters of mother's maiden name, first 3 letters of your pet's name) - Ash Urr Mia (does anyone else think this is weird?)
7. PORN STAR NAME: (middle name, street you grew up on) - Ann Mansfield (oohh la la)
8. SUPERHERO NAME: ("The", your favorite color, the automobile you drive) - The Blue Saturn

Float-On

So some of you are aware that I collect floaty pens. (and those of you who don't probably don't know me very well, at least not yet) So today one of the doctors in the hospital stopped by to bring me one from his recent trip to glamorous St Louis, Missouri. This is probably the 4th or 5th pen he has brought me and I know the second from St Louis, I mean how many different floaty pens are there from St Louis? Anyway, its so sweet that he thinks of me when he's traveling, or I guess it could be creepy. No no no I like to think of it as sweet, it makes me feel better.

Why floaty pens you ask? Well, about 4 years ago I was sitting at work talking to a friend and she was talking about her snow globe collection. She has an entire room for them, yikes. I just happened to see a print add in a magazine. It was a like you were sitting at a desk looking out the window at your brand new car in the driveway. On the desk was a coffee mug full of floaty pens. I thought it was a cool idea and it takes up so much less room than snow globes. That was it, I've been collecting since then. I don't remember how many I have but I'm a total nerd and they have their own display case.

I have mostly city/state floaty pens because cool people bring them back, (Thanks Todd) and I have a few cool odd ball ones like a fertility clinic pen. (Thanks Dana) I looked at a couple of sites today to see what was new in the world of floaty pens and a few made me laugh. If you any interest in animals, sports or the bible these should keep you entertained for a while. Oh, and don't forget the strippers, I have a few of these too.

The Freaky Wreath Lady

OK, let me try to explain the 'Freaky Wreath Lady.' First, she lives next door to Magda. Second, she spends a large part of her day tanning in her own tri-fold tanning chair right next to Magda. Third, she ALWAYS has a wreath on her door that corresponds with a holiday. (I haven't seen Magda's door, she may be a wreath freak too, who knows?) The beauty in the picture started out a month ago as a plain wood wreath. Then day by day things start to appear. It's always a surprise when I come home, like a flower here and there, some plastic multi-colored Easter eggs and Voila. I'm pretty sure she adds one thing a day until she's satisfied. The eggs disappeared right after Easter and in return we got scent. Yes folks, it smells like flowers when you pass her door. Isn't that nice? You should see the 'Christmas wreath,' with ornaments hanging off of it, the 'Fall Leaves' wreath and my favorite is the 'Valentines Day wreath,' complete with cherubs.
I am so lucky!

I Want Cheap Gas Again!!

What Do You Remember From High School?

I got 10 out of 10...damn I'm good...and I went to Denver Public Schools for 12 years! Who says we're dummy's?
You can take the quiz here.

AgeGuess.com

This website is a crack-up. How well did you do? I sucked...apparently I'm not good at guessing age based strictly on looks. (If I could talk to them for a minute I think I would do better)

I Knew I Was Worth....Something

I am worth $1,132,520 on HumanForSale.com

Country Men

This is why I'm loving country music right now.....thanks boys!





Dierks Bentley (he's my boyfriend, ok not really, but I sure wish he was)
I recommend 'Settle for a Slowdown' or 'Come a Little Closer'







Jason Aldean

'Why'











Eric Church

'How 'Bout You'









Brian McComas

'You're In My Head'

Magda Lives

I told you she lives in my neighborhood. Yes my friends she is tanning practically naked. This is what everyone in my complex gets to see after noon. Before noon she's in her robe (as seen right) and yes, that is a golf club that she uses as a cane.

(She lives right next to the freaky 'wreath lady.' I'll try to explain her later)


**Update: So I took these pictures earlier and then ran inside to make this post. When I returned to my warm chair in the sun, I saw Magda stand up like she was going to go inside. Ugh, her robe thing fell off and I saw her in all her glory. I know how jealous you must be...Don't be. Eww! (1:12pm)

Respect

It sucks being reprimanded by someone you don't respect

Easter, Tequila and Men

OK, I'm struggling today...I'm super tired...Need sleepy.
Here's my Easter rundown.
I worked yesterday, yes I am aware that it was Easter, but someone should have informed my 'Catholic based' hospital. (They didnt seem to care) So after a fun-filled 6 hour shift, I headed over to my mom's for 'Easter dinner.' When I say 'Easter Dinner,' I mean we went to 3 Margarita's and drank heavily while pondering the absurdities of men.

What says Easter more than tequila and bitching about men?

Nada!

Scary Old Woman

OK I swear the scary old woman from 'There's Something About Mary' lives in my neighborhood. I'll try to get pictures of her to prove it. Weird.

Hammer Time?

I'm sure you all have been wondering where MC Hammer is...Good news, I found him and he's a blogger. (and he has so much to say, I think you too will be impressed, or not)

We Might Have To Start Going Downtown....

So apparently the 18th season of the Real World is coming to Denver. The nightclub B-52 is being remodeled to make their house...It's huge & I cant wait to see what it looks like.

Mia Update / Car Mac'n

So a couple of you have asked about Mia...she had her femur/hip surgery last Thursday. She has 14 staples, she is walking/limping on her leg already and on kitty valium. She is doing really well.


Yesterday on the way to work I was sitting at a stop light, and when I looked over at the guy in the car next to me was motioning for me to roll my window down. When I looked at him like he was crazy, he put his hand to his head like a phone and pointed at me to call him. I don't think so, but how funny is that? He was car mac'n! (thanks to Nick for the naming rights) He was good looking, but I didn't get his number.

Drunk Olympics 2006

Our friend Ben asked us a few weeks ago if we would be interested in

participating in an all day event known as the 'Drunk Olympics.' It consists of 3 'sports,' a partner that is drawn randomly and plenty of drinking. So Saturday morning at 10:30, my partner James and I started with one round of Putt-Putt, bowled 2 games and then I don't even remember how many games of darts. It was my birthday, and so I may have been slightly intoxicated when it was time to play darts, oh yeah, I definitely was. It was so much fun and everyone was so nice. As you can see by the pictures, James and I won.

The Birthday Ring

A few weeks ago I told you about the ametrine stone my mom had set into a ring for my birthday. Since I got it super early and my birthday is tomorrow, I wanted you all to see it on my hand. I love it!

PS Tomorrow is Drunk Olympics so I'm sure there will be plenty of pictures for FFIS. Oh, and I'll explain what it is next week. Have a good weekend.

Part is Parts...Right?

So can someone please explain to me why dark meat is less expensive at KFC than white meat? They came from the same chicken right?

The Dream Ring

Ok, so there are a few people out there who have never heard of an Asscher cut diamond. (it's by far my favorite cut) I had a very interesting dream the other night and this was my wedding ring, so I thought I would give you all a little lesson on my dream ring.

<--This particular ring is a 3 1/2 carat asscher cut with a 1/2 carat diamond and platinum setting.
(and roughly $50,000)

The "Asscher cut diamond" was developed in 1902 by the Asscher Brothers of Holland. It is a stepped square cut, often called the "square emerald cut." They have a deep step-cut crown and pavilion that create what we call the Hall of Mirrors effect. When you look directly into a well-cut Asscher diamond you see a wonderful illusion like an infinite hallway of reflecting mirrors. Cool huh?

Poor Mia - Part Two

So the bad news is Mia did fracture the top of her femur. (thigh bone or hip, whichever you prefer) She needs surgery and the quote is $2400. Are you frickin' kidding me? So I'm looking into other vets/clinics and hopefully better prices. She's on pain meds and I'll keep you all updated.

(on the x-ray... look on the left side where the thigh bone/hip joins the pelvis)

Poor Mia

I spent 3 1/2 hours (and almost $300) at the vet yesterday because my sweet little Mia hurt herself. I don't know what she did but she was limping and crying on Saturday night. The vet said she could have a fracture of the femur, so I'm waiting for the radiologist to read the x-rays today to know for sure. Luckily they gave me (and when I say 'gave' what I really mean is I 'paid' for ) some anti-inflammatory/pain meds so she's pretty much knocked out. Poor Kitty!

Blog to Blog

So I think you would all be astonished if you knew how much time I wasted on the internet. But by far my favorite thing to do is click on that little button in the upper right hand corner that says "NEXT BLOG>>" Yup, I can do that for hours. Anyway, it takes you to someone else's blog. The best part is when you find people who just seconds before have posted something creative like "test" or "this is my first post." Who knew that would be exciting at 6:45pm on a friday? I knew. Sometimes I leave comments because I remember when my blog was new and nobody would leave a comment...that sucked.

HNT Series

I was talked into doing one more HNT post and so I decided to post a series. All I can say is...don't leave me alone with a camera.

Happy Half Nekkid Thursday!